Re: PostgreSQL 17 Beta 1 release announcement draft

On 5/16/24 1:10 AM, Thom Brown wrote:
> On Thu, May 16, 2024, 02:45 Jonathan S. Katz <jkatz@postgresql.org 
> <mailto:jkatz@postgresql.org>> wrote:
> 
>     Hi,
> 
>     Attached is a copy of the PostgreSQL 17 Beta 1 release announcement
>     draft. This contains a user-facing summary of some of the features that
>     will be available in the Beta, as well as a call to test. I've made an
>     effort to group them logically around the different workflows they
>     affect.
> 
>     A few notes:
> 
>     * The section with the features is not 80-char delimited. I will do
>     that
>     before the final copy
> 
>     * There is an explicit callout that we've added in the SQL/JSON
>     features
>     that were previously reverted in PG15. I want to ensure we're
>     transparent about that, but also use it as a hook to get people testing.
> 
>     When reviewing:
> 
>     * Please check for correctness of feature descriptions, keeping in mind
>     this is targeted for a general audience
> 
>     * Please indicate if you believe there's a notable omission, or if we
>     should omit any of these callouts
> 
>     * Please indicate if a description is confusing - I'm happy to rewrite
>     to ensure it's clearer.
> 
>     Please provide feedback no later than Wed 2024-05-22 18:00 UTC. As the
>     beta release takes some extra effort, I want to ensure all changes are
>     in with time to spare before release day.
> 
> 
> "Now as of PostgreSQL 17, you can now use parallel index builds for 
> [BRIN](https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/brin.html 
> <https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/brin.html>) indexes."
> 
> The 2nd "now" is redundant.
> 
> 
> "Finally, PostgreSQL 17 adds more explicitly SIMD instructions, 
> including AVX-512 support for the 
> [`bit_count](https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/functions-bitstring.html 
> <https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/functions-bitstring.html>) function."
> 
> Would "SIMD-explicit instructions" be better? Also, I know you may not 
> be using markdown for the final version, but the bit_count backtick 
> isn't matched by a closing backtick.
> 
> 
> "[`COPY`](https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/sql-copy.html 
> <https://www.postgresql.org/docs/17/sql-copy.html>), used to efficiently 
> bulk load data into PostgreSQL"
> 
> The "used to" makes me stumble into reading it as meaning "it previously 
> could efficiently bulk load data".
> 
> Perhaps just add a "which is" before "used"?
> 
> 
> "PostgreSQL 17 includes a built-in collation provider that provides 
> similar semantics to the `C` collation provided by libc."
> 
> "provider", "provides", and "provided" feels too repetitive.
> 
> How about, "PostgreSQL 17 includes a built-in collation provider with 
> semantics similar to the `C` collation offered by libc."?

Thanks - I accepted (with modifications) most of the suggestions here. 
I'll include in the next version of the draft.

Jonathan